Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have.
Love doesn’t strut,
Doesn’t have a swelled head,
Doesn’t force itself on others,
Isn’t always “me first,”
Doesn’t fly off the handle,
Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn’t revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end. ~ 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a (The Message)
Let’s face it: Sometimes it’s hard to be patient. You’re tired, worried, not feeling well, and everything your partner does seems to irritate you. So you snap at him or her.
So much for 1 Corinthians 13, right?
Despite how you might at first interpret this passage, it is not telling you to ignore your own needs. As Drs. Cloud and Townsend put it,
“We are not self-sufficient. We need to get things from others, and comfort is one thing that we are not made to give to ourselves.”
(Safe People, p. 149)
Talk about what’s happening with you and let others know what you need. Just ask. Be direct, but not demanding. Your partner shouldn’t have to infer from your behavior that you are struggling with something.
And, of course, your partner always has the option of saying “no” to your request. In a “safe” relationship, your “no” will be respected, not punished.