Partners continually make “bids” for each other’s attention, closeness, and reassurance through comments, questions, and/or gestures.
In successful marriages, spouses responded positively to these bids 86% of the time. Through their words and their actions, they invited more connection. They communicated (with or without words), “You matter to me,” and “I want to connect with you, too.” In fact, successful couples made at least 20 (yes, twenty) positive remarks for every 1 (one) negative remark!
