Have you ever let your anger get the best of you? Debra Barone (of the TV series “Everybody Loves Raymond”) is forever frustrated with her husband, Ray.
And it’s no wonder. He’s forever doing dumb stuff.
Even so, she’s not very supportive. She not only criticizes him (like his mother does), she also puts him down constantly.
In the field of marriage research, that’s our next and last communication problem. Communication Problem #6: CONTEMPT
This one is particularly toxic. Women who show contempt for a man – either verbally or nonverbally – probably won’t get what they want from him.
QUESTION: How often do you talk bad about him to your friends? Roll your eyes when he’s talking? Turn up your nose at one of his ideas? Call him “Idiot” (so he can hear you, or after he’s left the room)? Tell him he needs to grow up?
EXERCISE: Develop an attitude of gratitude for all of his efforts to provide and care for you (and your family if you have one). You don’t have to say it to him: Just remind yourself daily – or moment by moment – that he is of infinite worth as a human being. Find the good in him and dwell on that, rather than ruminate on all his shortcomings.
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