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If He Doesn’t Get This, He’ll Give Up Altogether

Posted on January 20, 2012

by Dr. Debi Smith

A couple of years ago, my 3-year-old grandson moved to California (with his parents, of course), and he loved to go for walks around my neighborhood with me. He was always drawn to the flowers and had to stop and smell each one along the way. I told him that we mustn’t pick the flowers because they belonged to my neighbors. So he would always remind me, as he admired their bright colors and imagined fragrance, that “those are your neighbor’s flowers, right?”

However, the same rules didn’t seem apply to the flowers at the bank or park or Carl’s Jr. He’d race over and pick one as soon as he saw them, then present it to me with a gigantic smile on his little face.

“Here! This is for you, Gramma!” he’d announce with great pleasure, fully expecting my reflected joy for the gift he so proudly offered. Of course, I was always delighted. And I refrained from shaming him for picking the flower.

How often have you responded to your guy’s gift with some sort of critique?

He “wasted” money on flowers. You’d rather have such-and-such. Why didn’t he … [you fill in the blank].

When we do that to them very often, it makes them want to give up. To not even try anymore.

Men really don’t change all that much over the years.

They still love to make us smile. When you smile, you brighten his day … and his life!

This is the third thing men need from women: Acceptance and Appreciation

You don’t have to pretend that he’s perfect, or that his gifts are perfect. But when you accept what he brings to your life, you are accepting him. And that’s a good thing.

Note: A woman’s job is to love her man and pray for him. It’s God’s job to make her man grow … according to His plan, not hers.

The best response is very simple: Say “thank you” with a smile on your face. You’ll make his day.

Would you like to know more about the Psychology of Men?

Join me for Prelude to a Dance, a free seminar for women in Newport Beach. If you have specific questions, email me now.

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