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The Ideal Relationship?

Posted on June 8, 2010

The Ideal Relationship. We all want it. But can we describe it? What does it look — and feel — like?

For starters, let’s take a look at the not-so-ideal relationship. Many of us have a habit of ignoring the “red flags” that could save us from a lot of heartache.

If you are a guy, here are a few clues that you may be headed for disappointment:

  1. Constant Comparisons: She talks about her past relationships all the time, not only to you, but in her conversations with your friends — whom she’s just met.
  2. Poor Boundaries: She can’t keep her hands off of you and constantly caresses you in public.
  3. Avoiding Feedback: You avoid asking your friends what they think of her.
  4. Fools Rush In: She tells you she wants to — or you feel compelled to — get married in less than a year.
  5. Lack of Support: You don’t have a full-time job, and she doesn’t either.
  6. Instant Family: She has children (under 18 years of age) from another relationship.
  7. Baby Boom: She’s approaching (or has reached) 40 years of age and is anxious to have a baby right away.
  8. Too Good to Be True: You met on eHarmony.com (or another internet dating site), so you must be a perfect match!

Dr. Debi SmithThere are lots of other “red flags.” What “red flags” have you ignored in previous relationships … or are ignoring now? Drop me a note by clicking the “Leave a Comment” link above! I’ll address some of these red flags in the days ahead.

Blessings,
Dr. Debi Smith
The Couples Psychologist

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