Women are notorious for selecting men with “potential.” For some reason, we’re drawn to a project rather than to a person. My guess is that it’s part of the curse that resulted from the first couple’s disobedience in the Garden of Eden.
To the woman he said,
“I will make your pains in childbearing very severe; with painful labor you will give birth to children.
Your desire will be for your husband,
and he will rule over you.” ~ Genesis 3:16
Over the years, I’ve heard lots of sermons and university lectures on this topic. But the most recent interpretation I heard makes the most sense to me. According to Pastor Mike Erre (Mariners Church), this “desire” is actually “the desire to control or to master” or “to fix” her husband. Not a pleasant proposition, is it, guys?
So Adam resisted, and from that point forward, relationships have been characterized by struggles for power.
Ladies, the challenge then is remember that we live in the Spirit. Life in the Spirit frees us from sin and death. Life in the Spirit means that we trust God and love our spouses. To men, love means they are confident of our trust and our respect. They have no fear of being controlled or fixed by us.
Best of all … when we trust that the Lord is leading him, we can honestly say,
“I love you just the way you are.”
That said – we women, we need to learn how to give honest, gentle feedback and ask for what we want in a way that affirms him and makes him want to give it to us.
More importantly, we need to learn how to pray for our men.
If you would like some help with all of this, I hope you’ll join us on Monday, June 18th, in Newport Beach for my next FREE Women’s Seminar – Prelude to a Dance: What every woman needs to know about the men in her life